Since everyone is either obese, fat, getting fatter or going to be fat I have some suggestions as to how we can stave off and alleviate this catastrophic pandemic. This is Part 1 of my essay entitled, “A Modest Proposal Regarding the Obesity Epidemic. After the complete essay is posted I will continue to make entries using this title, as the obesity epidemic requires us to be flexible in our approach and tactics.
First and foremost, since it is clear that individuals are incapable of feeding themselves, it’s obvious that we need to put the government in charge of food and beverage consumption and exercise enforcement. Since we need a worldwide solution to this epidemic of unprecedented proportions, perhaps the United Nations can oversee and coordinate the efforts of nations around the world.
Can anyone imagine a more potent and effective combination than the joining of the UN with various governments? For example, the efficiency the US government has displayed in running the postal service and social security program – among other well-run and profitable operations such as Fanny Mae and Freddie Mac – will be a fantastic compliment to the proven efficacy of the UN.
And one more thing; let’s stop using the euphemism “Western Diet,” when referring to the reason for this universal fatness when we all know that it’s America’s fault. It isn’t Canada’s fault or Mexico’s misconduct, Great Britain’s food stinks, the French aren’t fat and don’t export fast food culture, nobody has ever seen a fat Spaniard, and the Mediterranean Diet is perfect. So let’s be open and honest and blame America for expanding waist lines and the other fat-related maladies.
We cannot be fooled by America’s dominance in many sports and by the fact that America leads the way when it comes to promoting exercise and nutritional causes at almost every level of society through a variety of governmental and quasi-governmental agencies. The Western Diet is America’s Diet, and America’s Diet is making the world fat and killing people. As a matter of fact, America has even made other countries’ cuisines fattening and unhealthy. Mexican food is a prime example of how America can ruin a country’s food and make people overeat by the simple act of embracing the food of other cultures. Chinese food, as well.
The statistics tell us that obesity has been on the rise since 1980 – the year Ronald Reagan took office – so it’s just as clear that the Reagan/Bush administrations are to blame for America exporting obesity around the world and created a huge mess for others to deal with. Let’s not quibble over the fact that the definition of what constitutes obesity was changed in 1998, which immediately created 30% more obese people, without these people even eating a single Whopper or chugging a Big Gulp. Just as obvious, is that there were 30% more people out there who had a problem and didn’t realize it; it took a change in a calculation to get people to take notice. And for the good of all citizens of the world, especially the children, let’s avoid the unseemly act of pointing out the serious flaws with the Body Mass Index (BMI).
Bangladesh, a country known for its healthy ways, sports a national BMI reading of approximately (and enviably) 20, which is smack dab in the middle of the normal weight category. We shouldn’t dwell on the fact that Bangladesh life expectancy is 66 years (what it was in America almost 100 years ago) versus America’s 78 years. Americans are fat and diseased and living longer because of pharmaceutical intervention, while spreading this disease around the globe. It’s obviously better to weigh less, so let’s stop arguing and work together to make people lose weight and force them to conform to a healthy lifestyle.
Plus, Western Cultural Bias is clearly responsible for the negative impression people hold regarding the Bangladeshi lifestyle. The government has helped us avoid a major economic downturn, high unemployment, eroding home prices and a catastrophic loss of consumer confidence, and will help protect us from ourselves and our inevitable fatness. The various government agencies that developed the Food Pyramid, and it’s various iterations, obviously have it right. But back to solutions….I’ll get to these solutions in Part 2 of my Modest Proposal Regarding the Obesity Epidemic.